Many find it hard to understand the notion of pure love. Most have never experienced it. The romantics believe, jealously and possessiveness are central elements of passionate love. Mothers feel attachment is necessary to show care and concern. Friends believe expectations are integral to friendship. Pure love is least understood and yet most desirable. Let’s take a deeper look at what exactly pure love is.
First premise: Pure love means to want nothing, nado, zilch… sometimes we convince ourselves that at least we have the right to something from our partners, spouses or close ones… but no… not really. To want makes me a beggar and in reality the beggar does not deserve pure love, he deserves ‘pure pity’.
Pure love cannot be given it can only be shared by two beings of equal pure intensity – its when two individuals don’t share the same pure love, that that quality of exchange turns into a need for help, sympathy, comfort, approval, confirmation or sense of security etc., whereby one (giver) is forever filling a bottomless pit in the other (taker), with so-called love.
Pure love does not expect anything… I may not want, but I will expect and the two are slightly different. I may not want love – and perhaps feel full of it – yet I may still expect others to be loving in some manner or form! And in the process I become Mr. or Mrs. Fix It. To expect anything, means to set one self up for disappointment, and further disappointment as I realize I can’t fix anyone! I have to accept that I am the guilty party, not the other, for setting up false expectations in a world where more are empty than full of pure love.
Although marriage is a contract, love is not! You cannot own someone or get someone to love you just because they have signed a contract to be with you ‘for better or worse or till death do us part’. Pure love does not demand. Pure love is natural, gracious and freeing. It binds, but only to your higher, true, pure and perfect self.
In pure love I am detached, meaning I am unaffected by the outcome. I am detached from the outset, not that I find myself attached (and thus affected) and then need to detach! I do not hold onto anything. I let go and accept the person or the situation – no preferences of like or dislike – from the outset! This is a freeing thought for myself and the one I love. It allows for newness, magic and mysticism to flow.
Having pure love means to bring others closer to themselves and to their inner truth. Therefore there is utmost honesty and a deep respect for the soul and their process. Today we may not see someone in their highest self but we know that tomorrow, if we continue with our generosity of pure love, they will ascend to their greatness. Therefore, wish the best for the one you love and not necessarily what is in your best interests.
Pure love means to keep the highest attitude and vision for every soul. We realize, through a vision of soul consciousness, how lovely each one is; it is not an effort to see this. Once we are set in our highest self-respect, it’s easy to see everyone through this filter.
Be careful to not project your needs onto someone else… in a world where no one is emotionally complete, it’s a tall order and impossible to fulfill. In pure love we do not demand. We trust. We trust that we will have the abundance we need and that the drama of life will deliver the right people and situations to help us feel the beauty of pure love.
God’s love is the purest. He doesn’t measure his love nor love you on Tuesdays and not Thursdays! His love is constant and truly altruistic. Although we can’t be God, we can learn that divine love has to be of the same measure – pure, constant and selfless, first for the self and then for others.
It’s Time… to share love of the highest quality – Pure Love. My greatness lies in returning to this pure, divine consciousness. Stay detached from the offset and do not allow personal likes and dislikes to get in the way of the flow of the beautiful actors and drama of life. Pure love is freeing and generous, embracing and rewarding. Sign this contract of pure love with your higher self!
by Aruna Ladva, BK Publications London